PMS

Established · Chicago · Worldwide

Perfect Match
Staffing

"The Perfect Match. Every Time."

Boutique Placement · Unconventional Methods · Extraordinary Results

Discover

Our Philosophy

We Don't Place
People in Jobs.
We Place People
in Experiences.

Perfect Match Staffing was founded on a single, radical belief: the perfect match is never the position. It is the person you become while trying to survive it.

Our placements may occasionally appear — to the untrained eye — chaotic, mismatched, or deeply inadvisable. We assure you they are none of these things. They are precisely calibrated to unlock the specific version of you that your previous employment history was actively suppressing.

We have placed people in cryo spas, children's publishing houses, grief boutiques, fiber cereal companies, and, on one memorable occasion, an alpaca sanctuary where the alpacas had recently unionized. Every single one of those people is better for it. The alpacas are also doing extremely well.

100%
Placement Rate
*We define "placement" broadly
30+
Years of Unconventional Excellence
*Ms. Lockhart's personal timeline
0
Clients Who Have Regretted Working With Us
*That we know of. That we will confirm.
Locations Ms. Lockhart Has Zoomed From
*Most recently: a jazz bar in Berlin. Before that: unclear.

What We Offer

Our Services
(Such As They Are)

01

Temporary Placement

We match you with a short-term position carefully selected to be completely, specifically wrong for you on paper and profoundly correct for you in ways you will not understand until approximately six weeks later. Duration varies. Transformation guaranteed.

*Perfect Match Staffing is not responsible for viral videos, unexpected promotions, or personal reinventions resulting from placement.

02

Career Transition Support

For clients in the in-between. You know who you were. You are not yet certain who you are becoming. We find this deeply interesting and professionally useful. Please bring a change of clothes. The assignments can get unpredictable.

*Clients are advised that "in-between" is not a temporary state. It is, in our experience, the most permanent one.

03

Placement Wellness Advisory

Our in-house Placement Wellness Advisor, Alexis Fields, is available for complimentary sessions following any assignment. Sessions consist primarily of Alexis telling you about Alexis. Clients report finding this unexpectedly helpful. We cannot explain it either.

*Sessions are capped at 90 minutes. This cap is largely theoretical.

04

Executive Sourcing

For organizations seeking top-tier talent who do not yet know they are top-tier. We find them. We place them in something that seems inadvisable. They exceed every expectation. You are welcome.

*We reserve the right to decline any placement we determine to be "too obvious."

05

The Signature Assessment

A proprietary evaluation process developed by Ms. Lockhart over thirty years of watching people discover themselves in increasingly unlikely professional situations. The assessment takes one meeting. The results are immediate. We do not share them with you. We use them to find your assignment.

*The assessment is not a personality test. It is something else entirely. We prefer not to elaborate.

06

The Referral

Our most successful placements come through referral. If someone gave you our card, please know that this was not accidental. Someone who knows you well determined that you need us. We suggest you reflect on what that says about where you currently are in life.

*Perfect Match Staffing does not cold-call. We do, however, send letters. Occasionally from hotel balconies.

The People Behind the Placements

Meet Our Team

Perfect Match Staffing is staffed by four professionals who collectively represent decades of experience, one near-constant state of mild alarm, and an unwavering commitment to placing people exactly where they need to be — whether or not they asked to go there.

L

Ms. Lockhart

Founder & Owner · President · The One Who Decides

Ms. Lockhart founded Perfect Match Staffing after a personal and professional revelation she describes only as "the incident" and declines to elaborate on further. What followed was nearly a year of drifting — freelance work, temp assignments, international travel, and the kind of profound self-discovery that typically requires either a very good therapist or a very bad job. She experienced both.

What she observed during that year became the foundation of this agency: the temporary jobs changed people more than the permanent ones. She watched a failed accountant become a chef. A laid-off teacher become a comedian. A receptionist become a CEO. She decided, with characteristic decisiveness, to make this her business.

Ms. Lockhart conducts all client-facing communications via Zoom. Her locations have included a hotel balcony in Monaco, a jazz bar in Berlin, a boat of unspecified origin, and, during the memorable Season — the memorable quarter — of 2023, what appeared to be a vineyard in Tuscany with very strong wifi. She has never once explained where she is. She does not intend to start.

She believes the perfect match is not a job. She has believed this for thirty years. She will continue to believe it regardless of what you think.

"I don't find you the right job. I find you the right version of yourself. The job is simply the container."

— Ms. Lockhart, from somewhere with excellent room service
B

Bakari

Senior Recruiter · Client Relations · The One Who Actually Answers the Phone

Bakari joined Perfect Match Staffing after being placed by Perfect Match Staffing, which he describes as "a natural progression" and which the rest of the team describes as "exactly the kind of thing that happens here."

As Senior Recruiter, Bakari is responsible for client intake, relationship management, assignment coordination, and maintaining the genuine, specific, occasionally overwhelming enthusiasm that has become his professional signature. He loves this job. He loves it in the way that some people love a sport or a religion — with full commitment and no particular interest in whether you share his feelings.

Bakari identifies candidates through a combination of proprietary assessment tools, careful observation, and what he describes as "a feeling." His success rate is extraordinary. His methods are his own. He will not be explaining them.

Clients frequently report that Bakari seemed to know something about their professional trajectory that they had not yet told him. When asked about this, Bakari smiles, sips his tea, and says something warm and entirely non-specific. This is intentional.

"I didn't assign you to the alpaca sanctuary to be difficult. The alpacas needed you. You needed the alpacas. That's the job."

— Bakari, during what he described as a "routine check-in"
N

Nesta

Front Desk · Office Operations · Institutional Memory

Nesta has been at the front desk of Perfect Match Staffing for longer than anyone currently employed here can account for. No one has asked her directly. This is widely considered the correct decision.

Her responsibilities include managing incoming inquiries, processing assignment paperwork, maintaining client files, and occasionally singing the answer to a question nobody asked out loud. The singing is not listed in her job description. It has never been addressed in a performance review. It will not be.

Nesta's first words to every new client are "You look like you've disappointed people before. That's good." She has said this to every client. Without exception. Without elaboration. She has never been asked to stop.

Those who have worked with Nesta long enough report that she knows things she has no discernible way of knowing. When this observation is raised with Ms. Lockhart, Ms. Lockhart says "Yes" and changes the subject. This is the entirety of the official agency position on the matter.

"In this office, a warning and a welcome are the same thing. I'd like that to be very clear from the start."

— Nesta, orientation day, every orientation day, always
A

Alexis Fields

Placement Wellness Advisor · Life Coach · Energy Realigner · Spiritual Strategist · Part-Time Candle Designer

Alexis Fields joined Perfect Match Staffing as Placement Wellness Advisor following an extensive personal journey that she is always prepared to describe in detail and which typically takes between forty-five and ninety minutes depending on whether she gets to the Bali portion.

Her coaching philosophy is "radically client-centered," which in practice means that every session begins with the client's concern and arrives, via a route that defies conventional navigation, at a story about Alexis. Clients consistently report leaving sessions clearer than when they arrived. None of them can explain how this happened. Alexis cannot explain it either, but she has several theories about it that she would be happy to share.

Alexis does not use incense, crystals, or meditation in her sessions. Her coaching style is purely verbal and performative, which she describes as "a choice" and which her former acting coach described as "the only thing you know how to do." She has not spoken to her former acting coach since.

She auditions regularly. She has not booked anything. She considers this a temporary situation. She has considered it a temporary situation for several years. Perfect Match Staffing does not comment on this internally, except occasionally, quietly, to one another.

"Sometimes the wrong door opens because the right one is still painting its nails. Be patient. Also — do you want to hear about the time I organized a charity bake-off and literally no one thanked me? Because it's relevant. I promise."

— Alexis Fields, Session 1, every Session 1, always

Client Experiences

What Our Clients
Eventually Say

"

I was placed at a cryo spa. I accidentally locked a wellness influencer in a chamber. The video went viral. I have a new career now. I don't entirely understand what happened but I'm not unhappy about it.

M.M.

Former Executive · Current Success Story · Ongoing Mystery

"

Alexis told me a forty-minute story about her aunt's book club that turned out to be a kombucha pyramid scheme. Somehow I left knowing exactly what I needed to do with my life. I cannot explain this and I have stopped trying.

B.O.

Senior Recruiter · Believer · Tea Enthusiast

"

Nesta told me I looked like I'd disappointed people before. I cried. She handed me a tissue and said "Good. That means you felt something." I start my new position Monday. The alpacas send their regards.

Anonymous

Placed · Transformed · Requested Anonymity · We Respect That

Available Positions

Current Openings

All positions are temporary. All positions are intentional. If one of the listings below seems wrong for you, that is almost certainly the point. Applications are reviewed in the order that feels right. This is not the same as the order received.

Chicago · Temporary · Immediate Start

Front Desk Wellness Coordinator

CryoZen Spa & Cryotherapy Wellness Center

Open

CryoZen is a high-end cryotherapy and wellness spa seeking a Front Desk Coordinator to greet clients, manage appointments, and ensure the smooth operation of a facility where the primary product is very cold air and the secondary product is the feeling that something is happening to you spiritually. No prior spa experience required. Prior experience managing unexpected situations strongly preferred.

The successful candidate will demonstrate grace under pressure, an ability to improvise when equipment behaves unexpectedly, and a genuine talent for making people feel that what is currently happening was always the plan.

Requirements

· Excellent verbal communication skills, particularly in situations that are going sideways
· Comfort with cold temperatures, both literal and interpersonal
· Experience with wellness terminology or willingness to learn it very quickly
· Ability to remain professionally composed while a wellness influencer livestreams from inside a cryotherapy chamber
· No strong opinions about what constitutes a "meditation ritual"

Compensation: Competitive. Benefits: The kind that come from personal growth rather than an HR package. Duration: As long as it needs to be. Perfect Match Staffing will be in touch when we determine you are ready. Applications are not reviewed in the order received. They are reviewed in the order that feels right.

New York · Temporary · One Day Assignment

Editorial Assistant, Children's Publishing

Crankshaw & Associates · NYT Bestselling Children's Literature

Open

Crankshaw & Associates is seeking a temporary editorial assistant to support their lead author — a New York Times bestselling children's book author whose work has brought comfort, wonder, and what pediatric sleep specialists describe as "an unusual pattern of night terrors" to millions of children worldwide. The author is a man of strong convictions, stronger language, and an acute sensitivity to the sound of infant laughter. You will not bring an infant to the office.

Your primary responsibility is to suggest editorial revisions that soften the author's work for a younger audience. You will not succeed at this. The day will nonetheless be instructive.

Requirements

· Editorial experience or a willingness to develop strong opinions about manuscripts very quickly
· Excellent conflict de-escalation skills, particularly around topics involving children
· A high tolerance for profanity in professional settings
· No infants. We cannot stress this enough.
· The emotional resilience to read a dedication page on public transit without incident

Compensation: Standard day rate plus a signed copy of "The Midnight Visitor Who Never Left." You will want to read the dedication. Perfect Match Staffing will be in touch when we determine you are ready. Applications are not reviewed in the order received. They are reviewed in the order that feels right.

Chicago · Temporary · Ongoing

Eulogy Writer & Grief Support Specialist

Tender Endings · A Boutique Grief Services Company

Open

Tender Endings provides bespoke grief support services to individuals navigating professional loss, personal transition, and what their founder describes as "the space between who you were and who you haven't become yet." The successful candidate will write eulogies for careers, relationships, missed opportunities, and, on occasion, very specific grievances that clients have been holding for years and simply needed a formal occasion to address.

Candidates should be aware that clients may arrive with unrelated grievances they will attempt to incorporate into the eulogy. The candidate's ability to navigate this with warmth and gentle redirection will determine the duration of the assignment. Candidates who are excellent at it will be kept longer.

Requirements

· Strong writing skills across a range of emotional registers
· An ability to listen to people describe their feelings without visibly having feelings of your own
· Experience with professional grief or personal grief or both, ideally both
· The specific skill of helping someone process the end of something while remaining personally unaffected
· No prior experience with the swimsuit industry required, though it may come up

Compensation: Reflective of the emotional labor involved. Which is considerable. Perfect Match Staffing will be in touch when we determine you are ready. Applications are not reviewed in the order received. They are reviewed in the order that feels right.

Remote · Temporary · Immediate

Creative Consultant, Fiber-Based Wellness

Fiber Sluts Adult Fiber Cereal · A Wellness Brand in Transition

Open

Fiber Sluts is an adult fiber cereal brand that has recently found itself in possession of a name, a product, and a marketing crisis it did not fully anticipate. They are seeking a Creative Consultant to assist with brand positioning, consumer messaging, and developing a communications strategy that acknowledges the name while pivoting gracefully toward the wellness space. The cereal itself is nutritionally sound. The branding situation is not.

A box of product will be delivered to your home prior to your first day. We ask that you approach it with an open mind. The tagline you develop in a moment of panic will become the company's official slogan. You will be horrified. They will be thrilled. This is a documented pattern.

Requirements

· Experience in branding, marketing, or creative communications
· A high tolerance for institutional chaos and brand names that require explanation
· The ability to write compelling copy about dietary fiber without losing your dignity
· Comfort with the possibility that your work will go viral for reasons you did not intend
· A functioning digestive system is considered an asset

Compensation: Competitive plus unlimited product. We encourage you to pace yourself with the product. Perfect Match Staffing will be in touch when we determine you are ready. Applications are not reviewed in the order received. They are reviewed in the order that feels right.

Rural Illinois · Temporary · Immediate Start

Operations Coordinator, Agricultural Relations

Meadowbrook Alpaca Sanctuary · Unionized Workforce

Open

Meadowbrook Alpaca Sanctuary is seeking an Operations Coordinator to assist with the day-to-day management of a 40-acre alpaca sanctuary whose workforce recently completed the unionization process and is, by all accounts, taking it very seriously. The Coordinator will serve as a liaison between sanctuary management and the union representatives, manage feeding schedules, coordinate visitor experiences, and attend what the alpacas' elected shop steward describes as "standing committee meetings" every Tuesday at 9am.

Prior experience with alpacas is not required. Prior experience with labor relations is not required. An open mind is required. The alpacas will know immediately if you do not have one.

Requirements

· Strong interpersonal skills across species
· Familiarity with basic labor law or willingness to learn it from an alpaca
· Comfort with rural settings, early mornings, and the specific kind of eye contact alpacas make when they have formed an opinion about you
· No strong allergies to wool, hay, or institutional change
· Previous clients report this assignment has excellent dental

Compensation: Competitive. The alpacas negotiated the benefits package. They are surprisingly thorough. Perfect Match Staffing will be in touch when we determine you are ready. Applications are not reviewed in the order received. They are reviewed in the order that feels right.

Chicago · Temporary · Urgent

Temporary HR Manager, End-of-Life Operations

Utopia Inc. · A Company in Its Final Week of Operation

Urgent

Utopia Inc. — formerly known, briefly and optimistically, as a leading innovator in the future of work — is entering its final week of operation and requires a Temporary HR Manager to oversee the offboarding process for its remaining staff. The candidate will manage separation paperwork, conduct exit interviews, and provide what the remaining employees are describing as "professional grief support," which is not technically in the job description but has become functionally unavoidable.

The candidate will discover, upon arrival, that they are remarkably good at this. They will find this deeply inconvenient. The employees will find it transformative. Both things will be true simultaneously.

Requirements

· HR experience or a natural aptitude for telling people difficult things warmly
· Emotional resilience, particularly in rooms where people are crying into their severance packets
· The ability to coach someone through professional loss while technically being the person administering it
· No attachment to the concept of a company called Utopia
· Previous experience at a boutique grief services company considered a significant asset

Compensation: One week. Full rate. The experience of discovering something about yourself you will spend years trying to explain to other people. Perfect Match Staffing will be in touch when we determine you are ready. Applications are not reviewed in the order received. They are reviewed in the order that feels right.

"Don't see a position that's right for you?"

That is because the right position for you is not yet listed. It does not exist yet in any conventional sense. We are working on it. We will be in touch.

Perfect Match Staffing · The Perfect Match. Every Time.

Non-Serious Inquiries Only

We Are
Listening.

If you have received a card, a letter, or a Zoom call from Ms. Lockhart, you are already in the process. If you have not, and you believe you should be, we invite you to reach out. We will assess your inquiry. We will assess you. We will be in touch when we are ready.

No Need To Apply.

The people who want to apply for our listed positions are precisely the people we would not place in them. You understand.

*We will review your inquiry in the order that feels right. This is not the same as the order received.

*Perfect Match Staffing does not guarantee that the match you receive will be the match you requested. We guarantee it will be the match you needed. These are different things. We have always been very clear about this.